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April 25th 2008 I phoned up the doctor's surgery this morning for a repeat prescription of Temazepam sleeping tablets but when I went to the chemist to collect it they handed me a video of the Rangers v Fiorentina match! There is a warning on the cover telling me it's a certificate 18 and not to drive or operate machinery within twelve hours of watching it, scary stuff. I think I now know the secret of Rangers' success this season, they are so boring to watch that no opposing manager can stay awake long enough to find out anything about their style of play. Celtic fans will need to be on their guard this Sunday, I would advise drinking loads of coffee before the match and topping up again at half-time because I've heard rumours that one of their players often nips into the crowd to snatch your pie if he spots you are asleep.
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